The Fall can be a difficult time. Although it is the season that I speak of here, part of the inspiration for this post comes from the other Fall. . .
A component of light is darkness--here I'm speaking in terms of photons, yet this is also true of Angels, thus a component of the light [god] is the darkness [devils, daemons, aliens, etc.], but there are many of us that don't want to face this. If our world is split neatly into two antithetical groups, one being favored over the other, i.e. "Good" over "Bad"--naturally one would move toward the light and away from the darkness. We ascribe the "Bad" upon "the other". Yet it is in this season of death that we try and face our portion the darkness--to try and find balance in "The Mean".
My own recent journey into the darkness and subsequent ego death began with a comment by Eleleth in the post spawned by Jim and Jake's latest masterpeach, Hair Peace. After posting about the philosophers' stone, I was lead by Eleleth's comment to a gnostic website dealing with Harry Potter and Alchemy [Harry Potter For Seekers]. I found an interesting essay on this site and read from it on the morning of the 13th of rOctober. The essay presented what I've come to understand as the gnostic cosmology:
This universe is not the real universe.
This life is not real living.
This world is not the one God created.
What we are living in here today is a pointless prison, a lunatic asylum, a desert devoid of real life, an endless merry-go-round of birth, futile physical life, death, astral life, and rebirth. At best it’s a kindergarten for those willing to learn. At worst it’s life in ‘The Matrix’.
We are here because we chose to abandon the Real World millions of years ago. In a process called The Fall we decided we had better things to do than carry out God’s Plan and so we caused the formation of a universe and a life outside of that Plan.
And so here we are in a self-made prison where we, as the human race, are actively killing, enslaving, and exploiting each other, and raping, polluting and destroying our planet.
The Real World still exists, though we should think of it as a state of being rather than a place. It is a state of being that is eternal, absolute, perfect and devoid of suffering and evil. It is known by names such as Nirvana and the Kingdom of Heaven. The ancient Chinese philosophy calls it Tao.
The author thankfully shares with us his idea of where to find The Exit from this our so called prison. He believes that Alchemy is the path to God for the seeker who can identify with Psalm 42:
As a hart longs for flowing streams,
so my heart longs for thee, O god.
My soul thirsts for God,
for the living God.
Later that same day, I dropped the needle so to speak on my audio version of Valis. It was perfect too, just before chapter 13--which I thought was appropriate on this day, the 13th of October [waiting for the aliens to come].
I listened all the way to the end and again was treated with a gnostic cosmology in the form of his "Tractates":
Tractates Cryptica Scriptura
(Exegesis from the novel VALIS by Philip K. Dick 1981)
29. We did not fall because of a moral error; we fell because of an intellectual error: that of taking the phenomenal world as real. Therefore we are morally innocent. It is the Empire in its various disguised polyforms which tells us we have sinned. "The Empire never ended."
42. To fight the Empire is to be infected by its derangement. This is a paradox: whoever defeats a segment of the Empire becomes the Empire; it proliferates like a virus, imposing its form on its enemies. Thereby it becomes its enemies.
47. TWO SOURCE COSMOGONY: The One was and was-not, combined, and desired to separate the was-not from the was. So it generated a diploid sac which contained, like an eggshell, a pair of twins, each an androgyny, spinning in opposite directions (the Yin and Yang of Taoism, with the One as the Tao). The plan of the One was that both twins would emerge into being (was-ness) simultaneously; however, motivated by a desire to be (which the One implanted in both twins), the counter-clockwise twin broke through the sac and separated prematurely; i.e. before full term. This was the dark or Yin twin. Therefore it was defective. At full term the wiser twin emerged. Each twin formed a unitary entelechy, a single living organism made of psyche and soma, still rotating in opposite directions to each other. The full term twin, called Form I by Parmenides, advanced correctly through its growth stages, but the prematurely born twin, called Form II, languished.
The next step in the One's plan was that the Two would become the Many, through their dialetic interaction. From them as hyperuniverses they projected a hologram-like interface, which is the pluriform universe we creatures inhabit. The two sources were to intermingle equally in maintaining our universe,but Form II continued to languish toward illness, madness and disorder. These aspects she projected into our universe.
It was the One's purpose for our hologramatic universe to serve as a teaching instrument by which a variety of new lives advanced until ultimately they would be isomorphic with the One. However, the decaying condition of hyperuniverse II introduced malfactors which damaged our hologramatic universe. This is the origin of entropy, undeserved suffering, chaos and death, as well as the Empire, the Black Iron Prison; in essence, the aborting of the proper health and growth of the life forms within the hologramatic universe. Also, the teaching function was grossly impaired, since only the signal from the hyperuniverse I was information-rich; that from II had become noise.
The psyche of hyperuniverse I sent a micro-form of itself into hyperuniverse II to attempt to heal it. The micro-form was apparent in our hologramatic universe as Jesus Christ. However, hyperuniverse II, being deranged, at once tormented, humiliated, rejected and finally killed the micro-form of the healing psyche of her healthy twin. After that, hyperuniverse II continued to decay into blind, mechanical, purposeless causal processes. It then became the task of Christ (more properly the Holy Spirit) to either rescue the life forms in the hologramatic universe, or abolish all influences on it emanating from II. Approaching its task with caution, it prepared to kill the deranged twin, since she cannot be healed; i.e. she will not allow herself to be healed because she does not not understand that she is sick. This illness and madness pervades us and makes us idiots living in private, unreal worlds. The original plan of the One can only be realized now by the division of hyperuniverse I into two healthy hyperuniverses, which will transform the hologramatic universe into the successfull teaching machine it was designed to be. We will experience this as the "Kingdom of God."
Within time, hyperuniverse II remains alive: "The Empire never ended." But in eternity, where the hyperuniverses exist, she has been killed—of necessity—by the healthy twin of hyperuniverse I, who is our champion. The One grieves for this death, since the One loved both twins; therefore the information of the Mind consists of a tragic tale of the death of a woman, the undertones of which generate anguish into all the creatures of the hologrammatic universe without their knowing why. This grief will depart when the healthy twin undergoes mitosis and the "Kingdom of God" arrives. The machinery for this transformation—the procession within time from the Age of Iron to the Age of Gold—is at work now; in eternity it is already accomplished.
Let's try and bring this back to the island. . . our prison, . . .
Yes, I am treading very lightly here. I need to touch this duality, but I don't want to intellectualize it because it will drive you mad--and not good mad, the kind you have with tea and bunnies, but the kind that spins you out of control. I mean, is the whole point to find the exit? That life is utterly pointless aside from this? That Jack Torrance isn't insane, but righteously casting off the illusions of reality?
Is getting off the island the point?
So yes, we are broken and fallen.
Do we merely wait for God to hear our prayers?
Can we really believe in God? And is this kinda like waiting for aliens?
Can one really learn the secrets of the universe and escape?
but what about the other prisoners, who's going to free them?
what if you are their savior?
We do tend to kill our saviors though, (as noted by PKD in his Tractates . . .)
but you do get to shine like a star. . .
(at least for one night anyway)
Wait. . . are we all in agreement that we hate this island and need to get off?
Is there anyone who really thinks it heaven and not hell?
Now for the big switcheroo. I'm not talking macrocosm. This post isn't about the point of life. This post is detailing my microcosm and the point of my life. And all the dualistic agony is my ego tricking me into division away from wholeness wrapped up in my job and the idea of the work I really should be doing.
In the glass house post I began to stop seeing the parts and tried to take it all in. Part of that was showing those realms where I have influence--and this is a key distinction. In all my realms I don't control anything (despite all my desire to be in charge of my fate). All I can do is try and have a positive influence. I may be the king, but I am not in charge! (This is a position that is less than satisfactory for any egoic structure!)
Yes, I can see that you're Lost now. The dysfunction that PKD speaks of--that which was manifesting in and from "Thing 2", the feminine, dark, yin twin born of the one--I can sense in all my realms. . . but especially on the island, at my money work job--the so called "day-to-day trenches of adult life"
realms?
Although my realms are one [I only have the one life], science and the glass house post would deconstruct them thusly:
Work = Mind
Home = Heart
Sync = spirit
My suffering, and my regular darkness occurs at the level of my mind. The amount of dysfunction at my job is staggering. My boss so closely resembles the description of PKD's "Twin Two" that I'm astounded. Her system is breaking my co-workers. It creates suffering and sadness in its unconsciousness. She is not evil, and has such a warm heart, yet it's her desire for total control that's creating the stagnation in the system and the sadness. At times though, I think that this blue-collar, low-paying job is exactly where I'm supposed to be in this universe--although I do nothing but dream of escape. I tend to think of this place as the black iron prison. The Empire never ended. Yet. . .
The king really needs to be healed. And it's my job to do it, or it doesn't happen. See I am both the wounded King, and the savior. Concretely though, we do have a king at my job [my boss's boss who probably is responsible for her dysfunction, partly] and he too is not whole . . . he needs a savior, someone to show him the way out of his own dysfunction/disease, but God do I fucking hate this place. My own department really is like the island of misfit toys--all so stupid and broken, sad and alone. (I love them.) I long to hop in my boat and sail back to my mother where she will have reheated my dinner and stroke my hair as I eat. I want away from these monsters who have less education and more responsibility-- who are less articulate and make so much more money than I, (of course this is only important to ego). I mean Jesus, how come I'm not king of the world yet!
Andy Dufrain was wrongfully imprisoned, but he wasn't a victim, and he did make the lives of the other prisoners around him better just by his presence. He eventually did break out though. He found The Exit. An interesting portion of the tarot and the hero's journey is how after the tower of false consciousness falls, the prisoners are freed and the so called wasteland becomes the garden again upon the return.
What I'm saying is that, I'm unwilling to say that this life is a lie. Maybe the island wasn't real, but it was beautiful and meaningful to all those who experienced it. What is real? I mix with so many different and good people at my job, and they bring me joy!
It is my ego that wants off the island, into a job that I can tell people that I proudly and importantly do. It doesn't care that Melville was customs agent, or that Kafka was an insurance rep. My ego needs to be a BIG man. It thinks that being a fucking "Workman" on the island is so not cutting it. And the dream is that Oprah Claus will come riding in on her magic couch and gives us all book deals, or that Wes Anderson will want to co-write his next picture with me, or that Christopher Nolan will hire the entire Sync Whole as part of his consulting team for his next film. . .
"More than this, you know there's nothing. . ."
perhaps the freedom for which we yearn is from the jailer that is our ego?
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