Seeing How the Sausage Is Made

And there’s a lot of gristle in that sausage, possums, if the above is any indication. We came upon that on Television Without Pity, where poster SisterOfSylar said the tidbits came from a friend with access to inside information.

We have, of course, no way of knowing whether any of these tidbits are true, but if they are, they help to make sense of other events.

For example, during many of his post-win interviews, Hosea Rosenberg oddly discusses how demoralized he was after his make-out session with Leah Cohen, which doesn’t make a lot of sense. Earlier, we theorized that remorse on the part of Leah and Hosea was not necessarily the result of their consciences needling them, but, rather, “a product of discovery, a realization that their encounter would be televised, and would have consequences.” And if Il Colicchio did indeed have to do a finger-wagging chat with the two lovebirds, it makes this theory of ours all the more plausible. And it’s easy the stress from a fruitless attempt to convince editors not to show the make-out footage.

In any case, very interesting, possums, very.

(Click on the picture to enlarge it and read the details of Scott Conant-Fabio-Colicchio Italian-offs, Colicchio-sick-making food, and avuncular ursine scoldings.)

The Facebook Updates That Signaled Impending Doom; Also, Toby Young on Caseygate: A “Pretty Shocking Rant”

Yesterday, Pegasus News posted the updates from Casey Thompson’s Facebook page that seem to indicate in real time her growing frustration with being portrayed as a scapegoat for Carla Hall’s loss:

Asked about the snowballing controversy, Toby Young told CelebTV.com:

“It’s a pretty shocking rant. The judges don’t see what goes on behind the scenes, so I don’t know if what she says is true.”

But, as Miss XaXa is quick to remind us, Texas girls have a temper, and don’t take kindly to attack or loss.

Toby Young: I Might Be Back Next Season, Marcel Vigneron Has a Temper, and Stefan Richter Converted a Lesbian

From today's live webchat with The Los Angeles Times:

Bear Baiting: A Defensive Tom Colicchio Says He’d Give Hosea the Win All Over Again

Well, possums, if there’s one thing we learnt from reading National Geographic and watching Mutual of Omaha’s Wild Kingdom as a child, it is that you must never, ever, ever attack a bear, for bears wax exceedingly wroth and their wrath is fearsome to behold.

How much more true, then, is this for the Ursus Major himself.

In response to the firestorm that has erupted on the Internet over Hosea Rosenberg’s being awarded the title of “Top Chef,” Tom Colicchio called People Magazine—exclusively!—to give the irate a piece of his mind:

“If I had to do it all over again, reading what I’m reading, I’d still say Hosea wins. He made a better meal….We don’t care about personalities. We don’t care about who was making out. We simply care about who put together a better meal from start to finish.”

First of all, the teddy doth protest too much. As mentioned in this video, he does care who was hooking up with whom. But that’s an unimportant point.

This is the bit that is interesting to us:

Plus, he adds, the judges only consider the output from that night’s challenge – never relying on past performances or outside factors.

“I come to Judges’ Table with an idea of who I think should win based on what the challenge was – not based on who I think the best chef is,” he says.

We find it curious because on his Bravo blog, Toby Young has a quibble with that “never”:

I asked Tom at the outset whether the same rule applied to judging the finale as it did to all the other challenges, namely, that we had to disregard everything the chefs had done before and judge them entirely on their performance that day. He said it did, but with one caveat: if we whittled the finalists down to two, and there was nothing to choose between them, we could bring in their past performances as a tie-breaker.

As far as I was concerned, that was exactly the situation in last night’s episode — and, for that reason, we ought to give it to Stefan, who clearly performed better over the course of the season than Hosea. My argument went like this: Stefan and Hosea tied the appetizer and the first course; Stefan won the second; and Hosea won the third. So that was one win each, deadlock.

It’s a frightening day in our little corner of the Snarkshire Moors when we find ourselves thinking that Toby Young makes a cogent, lucid, persuasive argument, but end times appear to be upon us.

But take a look at Tom’s statement again. It seems implicitly to concede that he doesn’t think Hosea is the best chef, and that is the most revealing thing of all. That, we suspect, is what lies at the heart of the “popular revolt” on the blogosphere, a very American sense that the principles of meritocracy have been violated, and that the winner, no matter what the title says, is most decidedly not Top Chef.

Commander’s Palace Owner Loves Fabio, Gets Into “Squabble” with Tom Colicchio Over Machismo and Desserts

That's what Ti Martin, the lady herself, divulged in her blog:

I ended up sitting near Fabio – a past contestant. He is a dynamic character and sweet all at once. Across from me was Toby Young – hysterical – pithy. I was glad he wasn’t judging our food....

It was one of the longest 3 course meals I’ve ever experienced but it was a great crowd and a pleasure to be in the company of industry experts. Tom and I did get in a bit of a squabble when I suggested that perhaps “machoism” is to blame for the lack of concentration male chefs put on dessert. He pointed out that one of the contestants tried a dessert and it fell flat (literally – it was a soufflé that didn’t rise) – but at least she tried. We’ll agree to disagree but I’d say that was about as heated as the conversation got.

And if you want to get advice on how to evade an alligator if you're being chased by one, watch Ms. Martin tell you here.

Amuse-Biatch Tries, and Fails, to Parse the Shadings of Regret: Leah Cohen in Her Own Words

People Magazine:

Everybody is wondering, what’s your relationship with Hosea like now?
We’re really good friends. He’s my boy. I love him like a friend. Just straight off the bat we just gravitated together, and it was one night where we kissed. We were drunk and we kissed. It just happened. Of course, I wouldn’t have cheated on my boyfriend on national television, which was probably the most f—-d up thing I did on the show. I can’t take that back. I’ll take full responsibility for my actions.

Do you regret what happened at all?
I definitely regret cheating on [my boyfriend] on national television. He’s not my boyfriend anymore because of what happened on the show and other things. Do I regret kissing Hosea? Um, yes — but no at the same time. I don’t know. It’s weird. Whatever it is, I did [it]. So, there’s nothing I can do to change it.

E! Online:

Well, what did happen between you and Hosea?
We were really good friends and we kissed one night, that was pretty much it. What they showed on TV was really the extent of our relationship beyond the friendship that happened. And that was it. We hung out all the time. But I also hung out with Stefan all the time, and they didn't put that in at all. I was predominately with Hosea, Stefan and Fabio for the entire time. I didn't hang out with the girls that much.

Did you tell your boyfriend what happened?
When I got home, I told my boyfriend what happened, and then it was three months later when it came on the show. It wasn't forgotten, but it was, like, it happened, whatever.

…

Let's go back to Toby Young. What did you think of him as Gail's replacement?
Toby Young is a douchebag. He was just, like, whatever. He didn't bring much to the show. He didn't bring much to me as a judge like Gail. You valued her opinion. I thought his witty banter didn't do much for constructive criticism. My friends are like, "Who is this f--king douchebag?"


Grub Street:

What about your interaction with Hosea?
Everyone paired off and gravitated towards whoever they got along with the best. With Jamie, it was Ariane and Carla. With Danny, it was Gene. And for me it was Hosea. Did they portray it accurately? No. But we did have a connection and a strong friendship.

Did that get out of hand?
Yeah. That episode where we kissed should have never happened.

Do you regret that?
Yeah, absolutely I regret that happening. It was silly and it was a mistake.

TV Guide

TVguide.com: Did you know that the cameras caught you and Hosea kissing?
Leah: Actually, I didn't. They usually leave when everyone is going to sleep.

TVguide.com: How did your boyfriend take the news?
Leah: I went home and told him right away. He was fine with it, and then he saw the actual footage and wasn't fine with it. I guess the way I said it was kind of like, "Oh, I kind of kissed a guy on TV." Then he saw it and was like, "No, you were flirting with this guy the entire show, and then on top of that, you made out with him." Needless to say, he was not cool about it, and we are not together anymore.

Endless Simmer

OK, enough with the softball questions. Let’s talk about Hosea. What happened?
Not much. Whatever you saw on TV was pretty much the extent of what went down. We hung out all the time, we’re really good friends, and then we kissed — on TV. Nothing else happened. We’re really just friends and it went a little too far. We’re just good friends, we’re not romantically involved, and I wouldn’t say that we were on the show. I see him as a friend.

Are you still with your bf?
No. Unfortunately not.

….

What about the judges?
Gail is awesome. She was really nice and spot-on, but really critiqued us in a postivie and constructive way. Padma, well Padma is Padma. There’s really nothing else to say. I don’t have anything nice to say about Padma, so I’m not goig to say anything. Toby, I didn’t get. He was just brought in to give his English wit and I just didn’t get it at all. Tom, I have a lot of respect for.

What did you think of Bravo’s portrayal of you?
I kind of stopped watching halfway through the season. I didn’t really like it. They made me seem like this clingy girl who was just throwing herself at Hosea, and that wasn’t how it went down at all. But that was a storyline that I guess was interesting, so whatever.

Amuse-Biatch Photoessay: “Top Chef” Judged by Dwight Shrute’s British Cousin

“Top Chef” Shocker: Stefan Richter Baits Right-Wing Bloggers Anew with T-Shirt Symbol of Another Evil (Admittedly Faded) Empire

Toby Young Fesses Up, Feels Fat

When Worlds Collide: Toby Young’s First-Meeting Faux “Pads”

So, possums, want to know what happened the first time the 28th Most Beautiful Lady in the World met the man whose shtick is How to Lose Friends and Alienate People?

From the October 3, 2008, edition of The Scotsman:

“I recently boarded a flight from New York to London with my family and noticed that Salman Rushdie was on the same plane…I thought to myself that the last person you’d want on a flight from JFK to Heathrow when your wife and four children are on board is one of the biggest terrorist targets in the world. The next day I happened to be introduced to Padma Lakshmi [Rushdie’s estranged wife] at a party. And I thought it would be funny to tell her the story.” How did she respond? “She just sort of smiled and nodded.” Does he get that a lot? “Um, yes.”

Ah, possums, isn’t that eloquent response typical of our dear Pads?

My !#*&%@%!!!, ‘Tis of Thee: Trying to Be Patriotic, Brian Malarkey Goes Deeply Un-American

It’s not as if we don’t agree with his point, possums, but “o” what a difference one little letter can make.

(We ought to say, by way of disclaimer and confession, that though we were quite rough with him during his season, we have developed rather a soft spot for ol’ Brian. Whatever else one can say about him (and we said it all), he had personality and gave us lots of material, which is more than one can say for a lot of the people who came after him. The little mad hatter himself, perhaps with the passage of time, has become quite a good sport about the whole thing, which is really the best way for cheftestants to play things. We daresay “Asshat” would seem a term of endearment these days, and you know, it would be. And don’t think we missed it when he called us “twisted.” Coming from MFMalarkey, we can think of no higher praise; we practically purred with pleasure.)

As for the substance of his charges, yes, absolutely. In These Troubled Times, we ought to buy American and bitch American. Besides, isn’t it the teensiest bit hypocritical for Bravo, with all its much-touted and much-vaunted “green” initiatives, to bring in a critic with such a large carbon footprint?

On the other hand, as Miss XaXa points out, Toby Young is so full of shit that maybe Bravo thought it environmentally sound to spread all that manure around.

UPDATE: Bravo fixes the country!